Kindness Rocks

It started with an after-school walk on the most November-ish of days. I walked along the side of the road, holding M's hand, W a few paces ahead of us, kicking a rock along. It was so gray and cool, the trees bare and all the color gone. We were walking because I had asked M to show her brother and me where the park was that her preschool had been "hiking" to weekly all fall. I was curious to see it since she talked a lot about it; we had been hearing about having books read there, eating snack there, and playing tag there. I knew from the newsletter pictures and from talking with the teacher that it wasn't much of a "park," just a cleared area with a couple of picnic tables. So on this day, when it wasn't raining and there was no soccer practice or dance class, after picking M up from school, we were on our way to the park.

I thought it would be fun to let her be in charge. Something this four-year-old seems to have a deep-seated desire for from time to time is being in charge, being the center of attention, being on stage. I had a vague sense of which direction it was from the school grounds but had never been there myself, and her brother hadn't either, so he couldn't take over even if he wanted to. (This also happened to be the day that we for some reason let her go to school wearing a paper crown she had made and I was surprised to see she was still wearing it at 3:00 when I picked her up.) She was in the lead as we tromped through the playground, and as we cut through the woods on the edge of the school grounds. She led us through the next field and then to the right up a dirt road that became quite narrow and rustic as it wound on. She noticed a bright, painted rock on a mossy stump on the side of the road and was so excited, she had to scramble up the bank to get it.

These colorful rocks with encouraging messages are "kindness rocks" and are all over M's school grounds and even inside the school; they are one teacher's undertaking there and many kids enjoy being part of it. This fall M often came home with little painted rocks in her pockets. They were for the taking for anyone who wanted them, to be kept or relocated for someone else to find. Several of these rocks already lived in our house. My favorite, which is large and flat and M plays with (it is often her "phone") says "You are a rockin kid," complete with a backward "y." (There is a larger Kindness Rocks Project, if you're curious. I first read about it years ago with W in a Highlights magazine article. It is an actual trademarked thing, which I find a little hokey...and certainly not sufficient as a phenomenon to be sold to schools for big bucks as a social-emotional learning curriculum, in my opinion. Nevertheless, it's fun, it's a taste of the pay-it-forward concept, and provokes smiles at the very least.) M was no stranger to kindness rocks. But finding one in an unexpected spot was a thrill to both my kids.

Taking the lead as we set out

November-ish landscapes on the way

It's a kindness rock!

Pause to play with (regular, unpainted) rocks on the road

We were walking up into the hills and now had a view of a pretty, Vermont scene including her school down below. Occasionally I checked with M, are we going the right way? Is the park soon? And she'd say, "I think so. I think it's on the right... or maybe it's on the left." She was feeling a little unsure. I figured if we couldn't get there we could just turn back and it was still a nice adventure. But after climbing a quite steep part of the road (during which I felt impressed that all the preschoolers really walked up here, and I wondered if anybody whined about this walk), we turned a sharp corner and she said, "There it is! This is the park!" She was so delighted with herself that she had brought us there.

We hung out there for a little bit. The kids wanted to play hide and seek. They were completely entertained by trying to hide in this little space, as well as by the dozens of little kindness rocks that had migrated up here from students. There's another! And another! Let's hide this one over here instead! We found a gem that we just had to take home that says, "Be kid [kind] / Be happy / Kidness [Kindness] / give it time / Be awesome." The kid who made that knew how to inspire, reassure, and celebrate all at once!

A great hiding spot-- can you see her?

Eventually we made our way back down the road and all the way back through the school playground, where the kids crossed the monkey bars and walked the balance beams for a few minutes even though it was growing dark by then because it was November and the day was short.

 

We had not only seen the park we set out to see, but we also got inspired that day to make our own kindness rocks since we'd had such fun finding some out in the world. I can't remember which of the kids suggested it first but they were both full of enthusiasm for the idea after spotting that bit of color on a stump in such a quiet place on such a brown and gray day.

A couple of days later we went down to the brook behind our house and gathered a bag full of smooth, interesting rocks that we thought were worthy of being painted. I rinsed them and left them to dry. Later we painted them, each in our own ways, some of them all one color, some a collage of colors. Then when they dried again, we got out the big bag of Sharpies and had maybe the most fun of all-- deciding what to write or draw that might make someone smile or feel good. I had fun lettering a few. M's smiley faces and suns and dooodles were perfect, and I was pleased at how thoughtful W was at thinking about what people's struggles might be and coming up with sentiments that might make someone feel better: "Just be you." "You can do much more than you think." "Trying your best is better than getting all the answers right." "One person in the world being kind can make a huge difference." "Between being right and kind, choose kind." "There is always somebody watching out for you." "Just try."

And then....it snowed just about a day or so later and the ground has been covered with snow ever since. We had gathered the rocks just in the nick of time or we wouldn't have been able to do it until spring. The kids have had fun deciding where to place some of them and leaving them behind, imagining by whom or when their rocks might get noticed. We still have some, though, riding around in a bag in my car, because there's only so many places it felt right to leave a kindness rock in the middle of winter. It will be satisfying to distribute the last of them over the next few weeks as things thaw out around here.

Being part of the kindness rocks project, in our own little way, was not something I would have set out to do, but it was sweet, creative fun that the kids really got excited about. While it wasn't a homeschool thing, it was something that we might not have done if not for this homeschool year. I don't know if finding our rocks will make anyone happy, but it certainly made us happy to design them and wonder.